Creating Cordial for Chthonic Crossing

Preparing a Brandy Cordial

for initiating the Journey

In preparing for the first lesson in beginning the journey of capturing my fire through the chthonic journey of 'Boys for Pele' I decided I need to make a magical potion. The thought swam through my head taking many forms with many ingredients until the current recipe solidified.

I do not want to give away too many reasons as to why I selected the ingredients until I begin writing about the first song and provide my methods for initiating and exploring that realm.

I plan on using the cordial in a ritual at the beginning of the journey. The ritual will be typed up and added to the blog so that if anyone is joining me on this exploration you will have the entire process. 

The ingredients are few, and the method for making a cordial is relatively simple. 

(information about the ingredients after the recipe!)

Chthonic Cordial Recipe

6 figs -- diced

6 pieces of crystallized ginger -- diced

2 cinnamon sticks -- rubbed together brusquely 

Brandy -- enough to cover the ingredients

Pint Jar -- Mason Jars work well

Dice the ingredients, add them to the jar

Rub the cinnamon sticks together roughly and then add them to the jar

Pour the brandy over the ingredients until the ingredients are covered and the jar is full.

Cap the Jar and store it in a dark cool place (kitchen cabinet is a good place).

Give the Jar a shake daily for two weeks.

At the end of two weeks strain the solid ingredients out of the Brandy (fine mesh strainer or cheese cloth, works well).

Magical Properties of Ingredients

Figs are useful for travel, magical power, communication, grounding, divination and attraction. They have been connected with Isis, Buddha, Demeter, Dionysus, among many others. It is ruled by the planet Jupiter, and the element Fire.

Ginger adds the magic of power, courage, magical energy, sex, and more to magical workings. It is ruled by the planet Mars, and the element of Fire. 

Cinnamon sticks bring the magic of clairvoyance, communication, purification, divination, healing, knowledge, and passion among many other attributes. Cinnamon has been said to be ruled by many planets such as Mars, Sun, Mercury, and Uranus. The element that rules it is Fire. 

I Don't Need My Tongue to Find My Voice

Silent All These Years and The Little Mermaid

Leading up to the beginning of the ShadowWork I think it's important to focus on finding my voice. I have one. It's there. I can hear it in my thoughts every time someone mutters under their breath after I speak or arrive some where. I am prone to being awkward, and quiet. It comes off as aloof or pretentious to some, and they aren't as quiet as they think they are when they say things under their breath. Growing up I was taught to be quiet, and polite. Which really meant to be seen but not heard. Other people know better than I did, and its important that I know my place.
So I did.
I have.

Much like the little mermaid (the real, dark version) from Hans Christian Andersen I allowed my tongue to be removed so that I could fit into a world. But is it a world that I want to be a part of?

I've given up my voice, and my power at times I should have used both. I have found myself in situations that I did not want to be in because I did not want to upset someone else. I have remained silent for twenty plus years about dramas and events to keep peace. Many times it drove me to the therapists couch (at the best of times), and its driven me to cut open my own flesh (at the worst of times).

Contemplating this journey that I am initiating in roughly three weeks time I realized if I am truly going to find my FIRE, and face my Shadows I will have to find and use my voice. That the only way to bring any light to the darkest parts of my being is through speaking, writing, creating light to flash into the caverns of my being. I know that I will not come out unscathed, and I know others will not come out unscathed from my voice echoing off the walls. Or they will come out unscathed as this journey isn't about them. Its about ME. It's about how I have been Silent All These Years.

This is obviously where Tori comes in, and the connection to the Little Mermaid. When interviewed for Rolling Stone Magazine December 18, 2009 Tori said this about the song 'Silent All These Years':

"So I was with my niece Cody, who was a little girl at the time, and she's very much a part of "Silent All These Years," because she loved fairytales and stories, and we would share the Little Mermaid story -- Hans Christian Andersen and the idea that she'd lost her voice -- and watching Cody respond to this young woman giving up her essence and power, all for something else, and in that moment, I realized that when she had no voice, that just completely took me to the place where I needed to go to reclaim it."
 Like the little mermaid my tongue has been amputated. I'm sure to anyone who knows me would think that is not true. I talk a lot. I am opinionated. There is this distance, a dissociation between my voice and my soul. I continue to allow myself to be manipulated so that I do not upset business owners, partners, friends, etc.

I am writing this blog during the Lunar Eclipse which energetically is supposed to be about letting things go. So I am letting go of silence. Much like the Little Mermaid casting the knife into the sea that could free her from the spell the sea witch cast and allow the mermaid to return to the sea and live out her 300 year life I am choosing my own destiny.

And through this process I hope that I can become like the sea foam, and kiss those I love, and dance on the wind.

How Can I Find My Voice?

1. Journal- start to write. openly. honestly. allow all the thoughts and feelings to flow out.

2. Speak- use my actual voice to say No (when it is safe to do so), and be honest with why I feel a certain way

3. Create art- collage, water color, write poetry, etc

What Will I Do to Hold Myself Accountable to This Journey?

Once a week I will post something to this blog. It may be a stream of consciousness journal entry, or a piece of art (with some form of explanation).
So if anyone else is reading this help hold me accountable. Drop a comment if you see that I haven't updated in a week.

Capturing the Sonic Fire - A Shadow work through the album 'Boys for Pele' by Tori Amos

I have listened to Tori for a little over two decades. I first heard her back in the early 90s. It was the song 'Silent All These Years'. I remember seeing the video of this red headed woman singing and dancing, but I was young and didn't understand what was really happening in the song or video. Tori was filed away in the brain of a young child, and she didn't make another appearance for me until the video for the song 'Caught a Lite Sneeze.' I was mesmerized, and wanted- needed- to know more.

I ended up not being able to purchase any of her albums until 'From the Choirgirl Hotel'. I listened to that album on constant repeat for months. Then I slowly started purchasing her other three albums.
Being honest it was instant love for 'Little Earthquakes' and 'Under the Pink'. Yet, when I put on 'Boys for Pele' it was such a different sound I found myself unable to capitulate to it. I shelved it for many years.

I continued to follow Tori's career and listened to every album, and felt some form of connection to most of her later works. It was probably sometime between 'The Beekeeper' and 'Scarlet's Walk' that I decided to listen to 'Boys for Pele', and felt such a deep understanding and connection to what Tori was experiencing and recording in that album. She presented herself fully through her own journey to full acceptance of her shadow, and it can be truly unsettling when a casual listener is exposed to that type of energy.

Since connecting to the album so deeply that day I realized there would be a time I needed to peel my own skin back, and allow all the meaty, pulpy, bloody, and oozy parts to be exposed so that I can be fully comfortable in all that I am. After all, that is what underworld journeys are all about at the end of the day. Crawl through the darkness, find a tiny bit of light to illuminate the grotesque, once illuminated confront it and either destroy or assimilate it. That is what Tori did through this album, and that is what I am going to begin to do with the album as the framework for this journey.

Tori's  song writing is a tangle of culture, myth, personal experience, and divine spirituality. She seamlessly blends deities and myth of old with pop culture and occult undertones. 'Boys for Pele' plays out essentially like the hero's journey story.

I will be working from the beginning of the album to the end (18 tracks --  1 track a month). That is the goal, but as journeys aren't a linear concept totally it may change mid stream, and other songs from other albums may appear or some songs from 'Boys for Pele' may not make an appearance. I am going to explore the myths, characters, messages, and magic that flow through this album in order to capture my fire and heal my shadow.


Each song will be accompanied by mythology, images, and workings for the month focusing on the end goal. Every journey that the song takes me on will be from my interpretation and the inspiration of my understanding of the song.